So... yeah, hit the 100 pound mark yesterday.
You'd think that I would be really excited right? I mean, it says quite a bit about my dedication, my strength, my self control, etc. Yes, it says all of those things, but for some reason, I am not really all that excited about it.
I think it has to do with the fact that I NEEDED to lose that much weight. Losing 100 pounds isn't exactly something that anyone ever wants to do - no one ever thinks about all of the things he/she wishes to accomplish in life and hopes to one day lose 100 pounds (unless you are that much overweight).
The funny thing is that most people think that when the number changes on the scale and when the pant sizes change, your body image magically becomes perfect. So... losing 100 pounds SHOULD make you feel amazing and make you love your body. It doesn't.
Don't get me wrong - I am more comfortable in my skin than I have EVER been before. I own my body, and I know that it is what it is because I WORK for it. However, I still look in the mirror and HATE my tummy (I HATE IT), and no amount of Ab Ripper X is going to change that. I also still hate my thighs (HATE HATE HATE them), and I have to FORCE myself to wear shorts.
Once again, I still have this weird goal of losing ANOTHER 10 pounds and ANOTHER pant size. However, I am not so sure that is a good goal to have at the moment. At the moment, it might be a better idea to attempt to be HAPPY where I am. I'll think on that some more and get back to you... ;)
~Never Done
